I had a really quiet christmas. Spent the day with b driving us around. We went to Ikea. =) I like ikea.

Haagen bbq was awesome!! We get to catch up with each other. Can't wait to meet them again! Hopefully once more before my school starts. Didnt take much picture with my camera cause we were too busy trying to start the bbq fire. It took us so long cause we were doing it wrong the whole 2 hours plus -.-

I really really miss cheerleading after meeting up with them!! We shall go to sentosa and do stunts in the sea. Hahaha. <3

Tell me you love me?

If everything's just that simple. To not cry and walk off. If love's ever that easy,

'i like you' get together.

'i dont like you anymore' break up.

But nothing's ever that simple eh.

I feel like every single part of my body is breaking.

My heart is protesting from all the pain I am inflicting.

My mind is going to explode from all the thoughts that I am having.

I'm choking back my words, my tears, my anger.

How I wish you would understand.

I've got so much to say. I just dont know how to put it into words.

I regret fighting to recover.

Painkillers won't numb your heart. Painkillers won't kill the pain you feel.

So give me a drug that will.

Cause my drug tried to kill me.

All I wanted was an escape. A solution. An answer to end this pain.

I just fucked myself up.

I've learnt.

I've learnt to turn a deaf ear to the things that I don't want to hear.

I've learnt to close my eyes to the things I don't wish to see.

I've learnt to block out the part of me that feels pain.

I've learnt to smile even when all i want to do is curl up into a ball and cry.

I've learnt to not think at all.

Cause when you think, and you let your imagination run wild, it fucks everything up.

So, B finally returned the car. After 1 1/2 week of having a driver drive me around, I almost forgot how much I hate public transport. All the pushing and shoving. Sitting beside strangers that smells weird. Laptop in one hand, heavy bag on the other arm then digging for the goddamned ezlink card. GOD! HOW I HATE PUBLIC TRANSPORT!


p/s Faster go buy car eh!

Nowadays I don't even know what the hell i am doing. I spend my time drifting around, going with the flow, waiting for people, waiting for something to happen. Hell, I don't even know what I want to do anymore.

Nights after nights of trying to sleep then waking up all cranky and missing school. I really have to stop this.

On a brighter note, it's friday again. I get to vent my frustrations on the punching bags. =) GO WAISUN!

You'll always keep me waiting and I'll always be stupid enough to sit there and wait.

ME. IS. CRAVING. FOR. JAP. FOOD!

I've decided that my life is getting boring so i tried something new. Went for the training yesterday. Tough and sibei tiring and Charlie and vik both agreed that I am too girly for that sport since i refused to cut my nails.

But HAH! I'm gonna prove them wrong.

Anyways, my body is aching like fuck now but i feel so fucking alive. It's been 3 years ever since my last cheer training that I've felt like that.

I'm on my way to becoming muscular again. Don't mess with me hor.